I hope I never lose my sense of wonder. If that makes me naive, then so be it.

Thursday, 19 April 2007

a wee bit down

Yesterday, after school and before delivering a meal to some friends, I spent an hour or so slogging through mud and finishing the filling o' the dumpster. In went some heavy planks too rotted to be of any use, some old particle board from down near the creek that broke apart in my hands, and assorted old branches just to fill it up.

Then after supper the girls and I took the mountain of cardboard that had accumulated in our shed over the past 8 weeks and broke it down, then took it to the roadside for today's recycling pickup. This was a treat for them because they got to ride up and down the laneway in the back of the pickup truck, always a big treat.

After we got back they went inside and I just sort of stood, looking around and wondering how on earth we'll ever get this place to be what we want it to be. I felt frankly defeated. There is so much we've done but so much still to do. Our older dog Tash had pulled something in one hip and her back end just kept collapsing on her and I was having sad thoughts about 'is this it? will she need to be put down?'. I was tired. For a rare moment the dreamer in me was losing to the horribly practical side of me.

Today the sun is out, it's warm, and the dreamer has conquered again. I do like her.


Jennifer said...

hold fast to your dreams girl...don't get sucked in...

sue said...

How about a major work weekend? Maybe the weekend of May 19th or is your schedule already filled up? I could check with B and we could come up and fix fences, cut brush... whatever needs doing. Or some indoor work if that would be better. Let me know

Glad the dreamer is back today.